Warning: Immature Humor Ahead

Oh, hi, guys!  I apologize for my lack of activity this week– I’ve been working really late and battling a Head Cold to End All Head Colds, so no time for productivity and no energy even if I had the time.  I’m hoping to get some work done this weekend.  I finished my Aidez sweater last weekend, but I’m not very happy with the fit and haven’t had time to take photos yet. I should probably just frog it and start over, but that’s so demoralizing!

I set aside my sewing projects to cast on for a winter hat– my last year’s hat is kinda stretched out and gross, so I’m desperate for a new one– and a second hat for a friend who lost hers.  Meanwhile, I have something to show you!  You should probably just quit reading now if you’re a person of class and refinement, but if you, like me, have a decidedly lowbrow sense of humor, feel free to keep reading.

Over my last visit home, I was fortunate enough to dig through some old sewing notions at my mother-in-law’s house.  My husband’s great-great-aunt Cecilia was a seamstress who trained in Chicago in the 19-teen’s, and Man Friend’s grandmother held onto her sewing supplies for many years before passing them along to me.  Isn’t it amazing the way that family members and friends always know someone who sewed and are so happy to talk to you about it?  That’s one of my favorite things about sewing…

Aunt Cille’s collection included several boxes of buttons, practical in nature, organized loosely by color, and stored in… Ex-Lax tins!

Mmmm... "chocolated"...

Bwahahahahahahaha!  You guys… there are *SO* many of these tins!  Seriously, how many laxatives could one person consume in a lifetime??  Wait, stop– don’t answer that question!

The color scheme is one of my favorites– I loooove turquoise/aqua with orange.  The two colors are practically soulmates!

Brooklyn's Finest!

Here we have a little “Fig Flavor”, for those folks who enjoy a “pleasant and effective” remedy, but are turned off by the taste of chocolate (who are these people?  Who prefers figs to chocolate?  Would you turn down a box of Thin Mints in favor of Fig Newtons?  If so, you are probably 80 years old).

This packaging hearkens back to simpler times when advertising was less hyperbolic and more, well, truthful?  They don’t guarantee anything or try to hard sell you on the product– they just inform you that their product lends “generally good results”.  Wow.

OK, OK, I’m done giggling now and I’m really sorry for subjecting you to this.  As a reward for your patience (and for not looking down on my sophomoric sense of humor), a gift for you:

YES. (click for deets)

This gift is yours, and with it comes a great responsibility.  Use it wisely.  (Big thanks to KristyWes for alerting me to this!)

31 responses

  1. I’m sorry you’re not feeling well! There seems to be something going around here too, I’m hoping I don’t catch it.

    Thanks for cheering up my gross afternoon! I’m always down for some bathroom humor.

    When I strike up enough courage I’m going to start work on the Aidez. Have you seen the belt that has been circulating for it? http://katiesredumbrella.blogspot.com/2011/11/fo-week-little-cabled-belt-for-aidez.html

    And oh wowie, that movie. And Brandon directed it!

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  2. 1) I love your new header!

    2) I hope you feel better soon – I’ve had the same for the last week. Felt like I couldn’t sew anything because my brains weren’t all there and I was afraid I’d cut something the wrong way!

    3) I like figs, and I’m only 79. So there. But I would take the Fig Newtons AND the Thin Mints. Two of each, please.

    This post is hilarious! I was actually laughing out loud!!

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    • Thanks, Gail! I was sick of looking at my ugly old header and wanted a change! I hope you feel better, too! Colds are the worst! You know, now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure I’ve only had figs in Newton form (and those only when I was a little girl visiting my great-grandparents)! Maybe I’ll have to give them another chance (on your old lady recommendation… heeheehee!).

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  3. You made me giggle. Fig flavour does sound kind of awful! Thet are nice tins though – I like the “…will usually…” work phrase, doesn’t sound too convincing.
    The new header looks good. My lovely scarf arrived – thank you. x

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  4. Obviously you know my sense of humor is pretty, um, base. Yeah, rub off method. All I can say is that I am totally envious of those chocolated tins. Chocolated? I happen to really love a figgy newton, but 4 to 8 hours! That is not acceptable. Red & aqua is extremely acceptable, however. My fav!!! Luke Perry is working? And bearded?! This better get on Netflix ASAP.

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  5. ahh haa haa! immature humor is the BEST kind of humor.the wording on the back of those is too funny. definitely a different time.. i love the colors too. and i must say that i would choose a fig newton over most treats. they’re delicious. 🙂

    sorry about aidez. totally feel your pain. i was thinking about making that sweater, but i wasn’t sure how the open cardigan would look on me. what parts gave you fit issues?

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    • Wow, so many fig newton fans in the house! I should probably revisit them. 🙂

      The Aidez is small all over. I was between sizes and sized up, thinking I would like this to be a relaxed fit, and I even swatched and everything, but it doesn’t come near to meeting over the chest and the arms and armpits are really snug. It’s kind of a bummer. I’m thinking about trying to wear it a bit and see if it stretches out at all, but I was hoping for a slouchy, comfy sweater like the sample appears to be, and it just didn’t work out that way. 😦

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      • Did you block the bejeezus out of it? That’s always my saving grace. Except for Anhinga. It could’ve fit two of me. Hmmmm, well I would wear it a bit before doing anything too drastic. I think it’s healthiest to frog years after the project’s completion. It doesn’t hurt so much.

        Yes! You really ought to. Or better yet, try Fig Newman’s. Those are my favorite.

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      • It’s stretched out a bit since I’ve started wearing it– still a bit tight in the armpits and I wish it covered more of my front, but it’s wearable, so I think I’ll hold off on frogging it. Maybe I’ll try to reblock this and see if it does any good.

        Blerg– so sorry about the Anhinga. I hate when things turn out too big. 😦

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  6. Ha ha!! Nothing like a bit of toilet humour to charm a Brit!! The question is, do you still like turquoise and orange or will you forever have these tins in mind?
    And Luke perry looks like that now? Last I saw of him was in 90210 in the 90s … He’s grown up. He’s got a beard. Surely it’s a beardywig. ….

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    • A beardywig?!?! I hadn’t even considered such a possibility, but now I’m convinced it must be so!

      Teeheehee… I’ll probably always be thinking of these tins when I see that color combo now! So ridiculous…

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  7. Haha!! …chocolated. Sooooo funny!
    Thanks for taking the time to check out my blog. I’ve taken a little peek at yours as well. Thoroughly enjoyed this post! I’m now following you via bloglovin 🙂

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  8. bwahahahahaha! SO MANY EX LAX TINS!!! What was going on there?!? They do sort of make perfect small object storage, and thank god someone saved them just for the peek into past advertising. “Will usually produce a bowel movement…” I love that they just come right out and say it – not all the hinting. Sometimes I look at things in drug stores with their vague phrasing and I’m not really sure what they’re for (I may be a bit simple…)

    I’m so in awe of all you knitters – I’ve never knitted anything in my life. And I think its because of the frustration you’re describing. Although it seems like from the comments you may have figured it out? I hope?

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    • I know what you mean about drug advertising– sometimes commercials for pharmaceutical products just look like they’re ads for cycling or camping!

      The sweater’s not perfect, but it’s wearable. I like to knit because it’s much easier to fix mistakes and you can usually try on as you go, but occasionally you get a project that’s a total flub. Knitting is more meditative and relaxing for me than sewing, which is often more like an unending cycle of troubleshooting and sorting out fit issues. But it’s so satisfying in any craft when you finally finish something and it turns out just the way you wanted it! 🙂

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  9. Pingback: How to Draft a Shirt Waist (a vintage guide) | Ginger Makes…

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